If you want this car, you cannot have it until June 8. Sorry, I don't care if I lose the sale, this is the car I have selected to show up to the Schwartz Bar Mitzvah in Bensohurst, Brooklyn with the reception to follow at La Mer... a world class catering factory where you leave the Bar Mitzvah with a dozen bagels and the Sunday Times. You see it's my nephew's Bar Mitzvah and my 'Big Shot Macher' brother is trying to impress everyone with the affair... naturally I'm the black sheep of the family so hopefully showing up with a drop dead gorgeous 2009 Audi A-6 4.2 V-8 Prestige model with the uber-cool LED headlights, will convince my aunts and uncles that 'Little Davey Schwartz from the hood, aint doin' too bad.' The last time I went to my niece's Bas Mitzvah, I made the mistake of showing up with an A-8L. Sol Goldstein our child hood friend and now a Big Shot CPA was so convinced it wasn't my company car he ran a Car-Fax from his Blackberry during the soup and salad course to show that it was borrowed from Audi Corporate. So I'm smarter this time, I'm taking this A-6 almost an A-8 that we landed... the first ever..... understated elegance... loaded beyond words including Audi Assist so it warns if you are going over the lane... unbelievably beautiful in Black with Beige leather... And so everyone can 'plotz' (def. 'to fall over from envy') I'll leave the window label on that says $64,000. Now this almost A-8 and almost new supercar shows 11,241 miles. It will have like 12,000 miles, 'cause the day after the Bar Mitzvah, they have a big 'after party' and I'll definitely show up. So we debated the price, and we decided that since you waited for the car... we'll make it $46,495 with the balance of the factory warranty. This is truly a 'one-of-a-kind' deal on a one-of-a-kind car that even Howard Burman, our senior Audi sales executive didn't even know about (and Howard knows everything). You can buy it now, you just can't have it now.This 2009 Audi A6 4.2 PRE> More info

Wow.... I had never seen a Mugello Blue RS4 before...... It's very simply, a 4 door Ferrari with an Audi grill. This 20,000 mile RS4 is as rare as rare gets. Complete with Gray leather interior, it is a change from the usual Black RS-4's. Immaculate, incrdible to drive..... and truly a rare find at $48,995 with Audi Certification.This 2007 Audi RS4 4.2L V8 includes: 4-Position Driver's Side Memory, Audi Navigation Plus DVD Based, Auto Dimming Interior Mirror w/Digital Compass, Auto-Dimming Exterior Mirrors w/Memory, Bluetooth Phone Preparation & Voice Control, Bose Premium Sound System w/AudioPilot, Heated Rear Seats, HomeLink Universal Garage Door Opener, Light Sensor w/Coming Home Function, SIRIUS Satellite Radio, Sunshades, 4 Doors, 4-wheel ABS brakes, 4.2 liter V8 DOHC engine with variable valve timing, 420 horsepower, 4WD Type - Full-time, 8-way power adjustable drivers seat, 8-way power adjustable passenger seat, Adaptive headlights, Air conditioning with dual zone climate control, All-wheel drive, Audio controls on steering wheel, Climate controlled - Driver and passenger heated-cushion, driver and passenger heated-seatback, Cruise control, Daytime running lights, External temperature display, Front fog/driving lights, Front seat type - Sport, Fuel economy EPA highway (mpg): 21 and EPA city (mpg): 14, Head airbags - Curtain 1st and 2nd row, Headlight cleaners - Washer, Heated drivers seat, Heated passenger seat, Intermittent window wipers, Leather seats, Manual Transmission, Multi-function remote - Trunk/hatch/door, Passenger Airbag, Power heated mirrors, Power windows with 4 one-touch, Premium Package w/SIRIUS Satellite Radio - Includes Rain Sensor Wipers, Rear bench seats, Rear fog lights, Remote power door locks, Self-leveling headlights - Self-leveling, Ski bag, Sunroof - Express open/close glass, Tachometer, Tilt and telescopic steering wheel, Xenon headlights More info

I hate when I get an Audi like this..... nothing good ever comes of it. 9 out of 10 times.. Bam... I'm in trouble with 'The nice Lady from Audi Corporate.' You see when we get a super car like this V-8 Audi A-6 Quattro... that is a 'when new' $62.000 car, all the financial heavy weights come out of the woodwork. I offer them a great deal... they don't think it's good enough. We go back and forth... not good enough... then they tattle-tale on me to 'The Nice Lady from Audi', because I HAVE A BAD ATTITUDE. For example, this 2008 4.2 Black on Black was an Audi Executive car. Magnificent... all the right equipment... Navigation, technology package.... cold weather package...etc. etc. So we price the car at $42,995 with Audi Certification,... a fantastic buy. But we aint arrogant... maybe you don't need the extended certification warranty... how about just $41,000... truly an amazing value. So don't lose this unique A-6 over a few dollars. Don't let your ego get in the way of making a deal. This truly 'aint your cheap Brother-in-Law's Audi'. This is the uber-strength A-6 and not for the faint hearted.This 2008 Audi A6 4.2 includes: Advanced Key, Rear Heated Seats, Removable Ski Sack, Voice Control System, 350 horsepower, 4 Doors, 4-wheel ABS brakes, 4.2 liter V8 DOHC engine with variable valve timing, 4WD Type - Full-time, 8-way power adjustable drivers seat, 8-way power adjustable passenger seat, Adaptive headlights, Air conditioning with dual zone climate control, All-wheel drive, Audi Navigation System w/DVD, Audio controls on steering wheel, Automatic Transmission, Climate controlled - Driver and passenger heated-cushion, driver and passenger heated-seatback, Cold Weather Package - Includes Heated Steering Wheel, Compass, Daytime running lights, Driver memory seats, Dusk sensing headlights, External temperature display, Front fog/driving lights, Head airbags - Curtain 1st and 2nd row, Headlight cleaners - Washer, Heated drivers seat, Heated passenge> More info

After five years and three months... two suspensions and one exile, I finally figured out Mr. Barry, our esteemed dealer principal. You see, the guy can drive you nuts.... he actually thinks he's another George Steinbrenner... The Boss. He can break chops... he can be rude... he can be obnoxious, but can he find cars. The man is simply an AUDI IDIOT SAVANT. He can't write a complete sentence that makes any sense, but can he land unique cars... and does he have .......shall we say large appendages. . How else can one explain that with a $2.3 million dollar used car inventory... with RS-4's and S-6's... with a number of A-8's.... he goes out and buys a 2007 Audi S-6 Quattro... It's simple!!! He's like the RAINMAN of Mohegan Lake. So I ask Mr. Barry, 'Boss, why did you go out and buy another S-6... we have an '08?' He responds, 'Schwartz (that's me), there aint but 12 other 2007 S-6's in the whole damn country and this one.. mine's got only 20,000 miles.' So then he starts the same old ______ he starts poking me in my stomach to stress the mileage...1. poke...2.poke...3..poke... you get the picture. So while I want to strangle him, I am amazed at his latest find. Imagine this... a 2007 Audi S-6 Quattro with the 10 Cylinder Lambo engine. Silver with Black leather, carbon fiber trim, and technology package. This supercar has only 20,000 miles and is Audi Certified. And because these are tough economic times, we got a deal and a half and we are passing it on to you. $53,995 with Audi Certification.... Wow wow and wow again. Look, Howard Burman, our most senior Audi Sales Executive, says that the S-6 is the world's greatest car (price dependent), and if Howard Burman says so... it moust be so. I've learned to never contradict 'The Burman'. Actually after driving an S-6 with the 10 cylinder engine and tiptronic and Recaro Seats and and and... He is right. This S-6 is simply the finest car in the world... all around..... a Ferrari sedan you can actually> More info

There hasn't been any fights lately between Mr. Paul our CPO (Big Shot) Manager and Mr. Barry our esteemed dealer principal... until this 2008 A-6. You see Mr. Barry told Mr. Paul in no uncertain terms... 'We need some loaded 2008 Audi A-6 Quattro's , 'cause the '09 is mega-bucks.' Well Mr. Paul goes to six Audi factory sales and comes back with a big goose-egg. So Mr. Barry in his usual obnoxious manner decides to tweak Mr. Paul... 'Hey Paul, you playin' golf at these sales or what? When the heck we gonna get an A-6?' So Mr. Paul has smoke coming out of his ears.. not a pretty sight. 'Hey, Mr. Barry, if you're so smart, why don't you find a 2008 Audi A-6 Quattro,' replies Mr. Paul. Actually the response was more like Serena William's comments to the line judge, but hey, I've been in enough trouble with Audi to bring that up. So Mr. Paul announces he is taking his third unannounced two week vacation and rides off into the sunset. Mr. Barry, ever the deal maker grabs my boss, Ben Radzyner and says, 'Ben, aint you friends with that big shot, Hans Limb who runs them Audi CPO's.... didn't you two guys go to Holy Cross together?' So Ben ever the brown nose says, 'Yeah, Mr. Barry... that's right... what do you need.?' 'I need the best darn A-6 you can find... and I want the damn thing loaded... and I want low mileage... and I want to stick it to Mr. Paul and I want you to keep your trap shut. ' So now we have a 6200 mile Black with Beige leather A-6 Quattro that is spectacular... it is an S-lIne to really tick off Mr. Paul... it has factory Navigation and premium package. It is just $38,500 with balance of factory warranty... It was supposed to be $41,500 but I discovered a $3000 gratuity for Mr. Radzyner... not the nicest or most Kosher way to acquire this car, but hey... we went six months without an '08 A-6 Quattro and this one is spectacular. Don't lose this ... $38,500 and that's WITH THE REMAINDER OF THE FACTORY WARRANTY to really frost Mr. Paul.This 2> More info

If you ever ever ever wanted a magnificent 8 Cylinder Audi A-6 Quattro but you wanted 'A DEAL.' This Audi will fit the bill perfectly. I was recently at a party and I met someone who knew I sold Audi's, and he said, 'I really want a deal, and if it's not a deal... then I'm not interested.' Well I tossed his card, but I wish I hadn't. This is absolutely THE ONE!! A 2007 Silver Audi A-6 4.2 Quattro with 8 cylinders and all the goodies. Silver with Black leather, technology package, navigation, rear parktronic, heated steering wheel, Bose sound and only 23,000 miles. The deal??? Just $37,995 with Audi Certification and if it makes you feel better, you will probably find a used heart or intestines in the glovebox.....; it would appear that at just $37,995, somebody's heart and guts were ripped out already.This 2007 Audi A6 4.2 includes: Advanced Key, Advanced Parking System w/Rearview Camera, High Pressure Headlight Washers, Rear Heated Seats, SIRIUS Satellite Radio, Voice Recognition, 350 horsepower, 4 Doors, 4-wheel ABS brakes, 4.2 liter V8 DOHC engine with variable valve timing, 4WD Type - Full-time, 8-way power adjustable drivers seat, 8-way power adjustable passenger seat, Adaptive headlights, Air conditioning with dual zone climate control, All-wheel drive, Audio controls on steering wheel, Automatic Transmission, Climate controlled - Driver and passenger heated-cushion, driver and passenger heated-seatback, Cold Weather Package - Includes Removable Ski Sack, Compass, Daytime running lights, Driver memory seats, Dusk sensing headlights, External temperature display, Front fog/driving lights, Head airbags - Curtain 1st and 2nd row, Heated drivers seat, Heated passenger seat, Heated Steering Wheel, Intermittent window wipers, Leather seats, Memory settings for 2 drivers, Multi-function remote - Trunk/hatch/door, Passenger Airbag, Power heated mirrors, Power windows with 4 one-touch, Privacy/tinted glass, Rain sensing window wipers, Rear bench seats, Rea> More info

You know what I hate about these kind of 'one of a kind Audi's' that we've made our reputation on? Sitting in the sales meetings where Mr. Barry our esteemed dealer principal goes through his whole economics and marketing lessons. And when he gets a really unique car, he has this darn annoying habit of poking me in my ever expanding stomach to hammer his point home. So he calls us all in and says, 'Boys, I know some of you think I've lost a little bit off my fastball, but I can still bring on the heat.' 'I just landed the rarest Audi factory exec, you're gonna find... an Audi 2008 S-6... yup, an S-6... so Schwartz, get your butt up here pronto..' At which point he starts with jab... 'Schwartz, you know how many cylinders this baby has.. 1.2.3.4.5.6.7.8.9.10. Ten shots to the gut... I'm really in some serious pain. 'And it's got 435 horsepower... in fact that's a darn Lamborghini engine in there.' So ok, it's magnificent... White with Silver leather and Carbon Fiber interior. It has Recaro seats have to be seen. Then Mr. Barry calls up Alfonso, who is a heck of a lot smarter than me... He sticks a book in his jacket, so when Mr. Barry says, 'Al fon...so, you know what the original sticker on this darn car is?' He starts the jab thing again... '1.2.3.4.5.6.7.8.... damn, I think I broke my finger.... where you been workin' out Al fon...so?' 'Damn, this thing hurts.' So we're all rollin' on the floor and Mr. Barry's gettin' really ticked. 'You guys, just wait... I'm gonna fix you... Howard Burman's the only one who's gonna sell this S-6...And to really stick it to you, he can sell it for just $59,995. Well that's more than $25,000 off the original sticker, so everybody starts yellin'... 'No way ..no fair...(XXXXX).' Well it aint fair, 'cause Burman gets all the special cars to sell and at a heck of a price, and this is as special as it gets. Howard's off on Thursday so give me a call then, we'll see what's fair.This 2008 Audi S6 5.2 (4DR ALL-WHEEL DRIV> More info

Absolutely the Audi A-4 that everone... and I mean everyone wants. Black on Black 6 Speed Stick Shift. S-Line. Premium Package, Convenience Package, Factory Navigation, Blue Tooth, Cold Weather Package... wow... wow....wow. Only 23,000 miles., and very attractively priced at $29,995 WITH AUDI CERTIFICATION. And just to rememer it's an '08.... not an '07. There were darn darn few of these babies built. We have really just a tiny tiny amount of wiggle room. We bought this direct from Audi and they weren't in a holiday spirit as there were about a million Audi dealers looking for this car.This 2008 Audi A4 2.0T SPECIAL EDITION includes: 1 disc DVD to cover all of US and Canada, Auto-Dimming Interior Mirror w/Digital Compass, Bi-Xenon Headlights w/Adaptive Front Lighting, full color map-based navigation screen, GALA (Graduated Audio Level Adjustment) varies volume based on vehicle speed (deactivated if equipped with Bose AudioPilot system), Glovebox iPod Interface Also Includes Includes AM/FM/SAT radio bands; 30 combined radio presets, HomeLink Universal Garage Door Opener, LCD screen dimensions: 3' vertical; 5.5' horizontal; 6.25' diagonal and 5 industry-leading language settings and voice guidance (English/French/Spanish/Italian/German). , Light Sensor w/Coming Home Function, MMI control logic with similar screen design and font, Power Passenger Seat, Rain Sensor, SD car inserts (2) to store MP3 data (music) to transfer into radio controls, theft deterrent design which only fits an Audi vehicle, 2 liter inline 4 cylinder DOHC engine, 200 horsepower, 4 Doors, 4-wheel ABS brakes, 4WD Type - Full-time, 8-way power adjustable drivers seat, Air conditioning with dual zone climate control, All-wheel drive, Audi Navigation Plus w/iPod Interface - Includes 5-Function Color Trip Computer, Audio controls on steering wheel, Bluetooth Phone Preparation, Center Console - Full with storage, Clock - In-dash, Compressor - Intercooled turbo, Convenience Package -> More info

Black on Black 2009 Audi A-4 Quattro for thousands less than the when new price. With only 9600 miles, this is a whale of a deal at just $29,995 with the balance of the factory warranty.This 2009 Audi A4 2.0T PREMIUM includes: 2 liter inline 4 cylinder DOHC engine, 211 horsepower, 4 Doors, 4-wheel ABS brakes, 4WD Type - Full-time, 8-way power adjustable drivers seat, 8-way power adjustable passenger seat, Air conditioning with climate control, All-wheel drive, Audi Music Interface w/iPod Cable, Audio controls on steering wheel, Center Console - Full with storage, Clock - In-dash, Compressor - Intercooled turbo, External temperature display, Front fog/driving lights, Head airbags - Curtain 1st and 2nd row, Heated Front Seats, Heated passenger mirror - Heated, Heated Windshield Washer Jets - Jets, HomeLink Universal Garage Door Opener, Interior air filtration, Intermittent window wipers, Manual Transmission, Multi-function remote - Trunk/hatch/door, Overhead console - Mini with storage, Passenger Airbag, Power heated driver mirror, Power windows with 4 one-touch, Privacy/tinted glass, Rear bench seats, Rear defogger, Rear fog lights, Remote power door locks, Signal mirrors - Turn signal in mirrors, Speed-proportional power steering, Stability control, Sunroof - Express open/close glass, Tachometer, Tilt and telescopic steering wheel, Traction control - ABS and driveline, Video Monitor Location - Front More info