After six months of owning my 2007 Maserati Quattroporte, during which the car spent five months broken, I decided to give it away while my Italian exotic was still functional. Selling it would have been the smarter option — but I’m not smart. Instead, I decided to give it away — and to make it more fun, I hosted an endurance challenge in my garage. In total, eight friends showed up Saturday morning wanting my Maserati — four of whom were wearing diapers.
In classic YouTube fashion, I decided to play "last hand wins" with the Maserati. Each competitor put one hand on the car, and could not remove it until they were the last person remaining. They also could not sit, kneel, lay down or take their feet off the ground. I also wanted the winner of this Maserati to be someone who actually wanted it, so I required that the new owner keep it for at least six months. That caused two people to quit immediately.
The remaining six competitors lasted over two hours without any issues. This is when I decided to start torturing the competitors, and I thought tossing around a giant dead spider that I found in my garage would be a good way to start. Surprisingly, the only one startled enough by this was Drew Casper, the curator at the Midwest Dream Car Collection, who flinched his hand away when the spider was tossed in his general direction. He drove two hours just to compete, so I felt terrible that I had knocked him out by joking around.
Drew stayed around for lunch, which was an Italian feast that I catered using the Maserati as a table. Many of the competitors had been fasting for the last 24 hours, and the diapers they were wearing was a last resort — so watching me gorge myself on pasta and pizza must have been torture for them. One of them did partake in the food, though, and had brought a backpack full of supplies as well. That proved to be his undoing — as after eating lunch, he went to grab something in his backpack, and instinctively crouched down on to his knees as he dug pulled something out. Other competitors pointed out his error — and since he couldn’t follow basic rules, he was eliminated as well.
Other than a brief drive around the neighborhood, where the competitors jogged along with their hands on the car, the next eight hours were uneventful. Finally, as nightfall came, fatigue began to set in, and I decided that taking away their phones would damage their morale as well. Not long after, one of the competitors crouched to stretch his legs, and his hands slipped off the decklid. This little mistake cost him a Maserati, and 10 hours of his life that he could never get back.
With the final three competitors remaining at 12 hours into the challenge, I decided to step up the psychological warfare, and I began playing YouTube videos on a TV at the highest volume possible. This might have contributed to a lapse in concentration with the lone female competitor, who lifted her hand in frustration after losing a round of tic-tac-toe to another player. She didn’t know why she did it, and she was really mad at herself.
Shortly after her elimination at the 14 hour mark, I set up a security camera — and since I assumed the remaining two would continue all night long, I tucked myself into bed. At hour 17, though, the 17-year-old finalist began nodding off. In a daze, he said his joints were beginning to lock up, and he felt dehydrated, so decided to have a drink of water. Acting instinctively, he used two hands to open the bottle, forgetting after 17 hours that his hand needed to remain on the car — and he lost the challenge at around 3:15 a.m. After 17 hours spanning two days, we finally had a winner.
I found it interesting that none of the serious competitors left by choice, as all of them made some mistakes that eventually ended their chances. The winner, Adrian, is a father of five, and a huge car guy — but with family being a priority, he never treated himself to an exotic car. So I was really happy that he won the Quattroporte — but I wasn’t happy when he called me on the way home and said the check engine light came on. Welcome to Maserati life… Find a Maserati Quattroporte for sale