Video | I’m Selling 7 Cars in My Hooptie Fleet

Recently, I did a rough count of all the vehicles in my possession — and gave up at somewhere over 30. This ridiculous number is way more than my inventory levels at the height of my car dealer days — except now, I’m the only customer — and the easiest mark you’ve ever met. Still, even I realize that a car for every day of the month is just a little excessive, so I’m selling off a magnificent seven examples of my hoopties.

My reality TV show project is nearing its completion, and so far, a crew has followed me around to buy 21 cars — a car for each episode. We’ve finally settled on a name — "Car Issues With Tyler Hoover" — which is a pretty apt description given the issues I have with car buying, as well as the issues the cars usually have along the way. I still don’t know when it will air — but it will be sometime this year — and when it’s finished, I’ll have way too many cars to deal with. I can’t sell any of them until production is totally wrapped, just in case we need to reshoot something, so I’ve decided to let go of several personal cars. I’ve actually already sold five of them.

The first one to go, not surprisingly, was my 2004 Bentley Continental GT project. Carmax offered me $4,000, and I probably could have gotten a low-teens number for it had I advertised it properly — but I ended up selling it for $11,000 to another YouTuber who is determined to fix it. Considering I paid $27,700 for the car, and another few thousand in shipping and parts, this is a massive loss (certainly a record for me) — but I’m also certain that if I saw this project through to the end, I would have lost even more money.

Still, not every car has been a fire sale. Someone managed to talk me out of my 1993 Lexus ES300 5-speed with a $2,500 offer. Considering I only paid $200 for the car and put less than $700 into it, this was a rare win for me — but I also gave up one of my more reliable and interesting cars. This is the same story on my Mercury Marauder, which will be going away in a few weeks after someone offered to buy it for the $5,000 that I paid for it. Since it’s going to a really good home, and I have plenty of other land yachts lying around, I decided to let that one go as well.

My 1998 Jeep Cherokee with 361,000 miles will be gone soon as well. I decided to take a random email offer from a viewer for $2,500, which may sound like a great price considering I paid $300 for it — but after a year of repairs and improvements, I have over $4,200 invested. These XJ body Cherokees are starting to fetch some crazy prices, but $2,500 was fair for this one, considering the AC didn’t work and the ridiculously high mileage. My Porsche Cayenne Turbo sold under similar circumstances as well, starting with a random email that came within an hour of posting last week’s video. I actually had more than 50 crazy people inquire about the car — but a buyer out of the D.C. area was the first to send the money. He’s planning to fly out and drive it home — so say a little prayer for him.

Unsurprisingly, the two cars that I’ve decided to sell, but haven’t found a home for yet, are my pair of aged, broken BMWs. After giving my girlfriend a broken 1995 BMW M3 for Christmas, it hasn’t left the Car Wizard’s shop. I paid $3,000 for the car, and easily spent another $3,000 in repairs. It’s well sorted at this point, but my girlfriend has politely suggested I sell it to someone else. I expect to take a small loss on it as well — but nowhere near the blow I’m expecting with my 1991 BMW 850i. Since its electrical issues drained the battery, it hasn’t moved in months — and a massive transmission fluid leak has left a puddle beneath it. With the security system on the fritz, it’s not allowing me to access the trunk to replace the batteries, so it may have to be dragged out of its resting place and towed somewhere. Unfortunately, the seller did not disclose the numerous issues with the car, and I overpaid at $8,500 with shipping to Kansas. After $2,000 spent in the first round of repairs, there’s still a long way to go — but I’ve lost interest. At this point, I’d be happy to get half my money back out of it.

Clearly, I’m taking some pretty hard hits this year — but overall, things could be a lot worse. I’ve certainly lost my appetite for buying sketchy cars sight unseen from across the country, and have moved on to buying nice cars sight unseen from across the country — like my recent Tesla Model S purchase, and one more that I’ll be making a video on soon. Of course, I’m an idiot, and choose to end this post about me being responsible by teasing about buying another car …

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