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The Hummer H2 Had the Most Ridiculous Third Row Seat Ever

Today, I’m going to talk about the Hummer H2’s third-row seat, which I cannot do without insulting the Hummer H2. This is something I do fairly often — insulting the Hummer H2, I mean — and it invariably sends certain people into a fit of rage. These people are known as "Hummer H2 owners," and the angry e-mails I get from them are always among the best. See the Hummer H2 models for sale near you

So today I’m going to kick off a new flurry of angry e-mails by insulting the H2’s third-row seat, which is rather easy to do, because the H2’s third-row seat is ridiculous.

Here’s the situation. As many of you know, the Hummer H2 used a modified version of the same chassis used by the Chevy Tahoe. The chassis was modified more than most people realize, but still, it shared some components — and, more importantly, it shared the size. The Hummer H2 was a massive SUV, especially by the standards of 2003, when it came out, which meant it needed to have a third-row seat. So General Motors put one in.

Sort of.

I say "sort of," because the H2 had a seat, yes, but it didn’t exactly have a third row. Instead, it had precisely one single seat in the third row. There was no way you could get two seats. The H2 offered a configuration where there were two seats in the front row, three in the middle row, and, yes, one in the third row.

The reason this happened is the spare tire. Most early H2 models didn’t have a rear-mounted spare tire, and the H2 never offered an underside-mounted spare tire. Instead, the H2 included the spare tire inside the vehicle. Since the H2’s spare tire was so massively huge, this meant sticking it in the cargo area, which it shared with the rear seat. And the result is as you see above: the third row contains one seat and one spare tire. If you look at the picture of the Hummer without the tire in the cargo area, you can see that there wasn’t even a latching system for a second seat to bolt down, even if you wanted to remove the tire in favor of a seat. You were, quite simply, stuck with a single-seat third row.

I’ve found a few pictures of H2s with aftermarket third-row seats that do indeed have two seats, so there’s an available solution out there for people who just couldn’t stand the stock third row. Additionally, I haven’t been able to figure out if GM finally relented and put dual seats in the back on later models with a tailgate-mounted spare. But I do know for at least the early years, the Hummer H2’s third row was absolutely ridiculous: just one single seat mounted right next to the spare tire. Find a Hummer H2 for sale

Doug DeMuro is an automotive journalist who has written for many online and magazine publications. He once owned a Nissan Cube and a Ferrari 360 Modena. At the same time.

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